Solicitor speaks freely

I would like to help in any way I can. I have something of a reputation as a 'lone wolf' when it comes to representing men in difficult matrimonial cases. I cannot claim to have had great success in many of these cases because as you know the legal system in common with the bulk of the rest of our society is handicapped by prejudice. The stereotypes of the bad man and the angelic woman pervade.

I have to say that I was beginning to give up any hope of things changing during my lifetime. In the legal cases when I have had 'success' the human cost has been enormous. What appears to be required for men to succeed in matrimonial cases involving children, is a form of ruthlessness that very few men possess. In one of my cases the woman has taken her own life. In many, the children no longer have any contact with the mother. The only women capable of being challenged by men in these cases are the women who are openly 'deviant' in a way which is recognised by society as being really bad for the children. A man faced with this needs to immediately attack using social services, police and any other means he can summon, before securing court orders etc. He needs to act without pity and without any thought of ever going back. He needs to close his mind to any possibility that he might be premature or that there might be a recovery. Very few men dare to fight in this arena. Most of us are softer, more rounded, mature individuals, who cannot believe that the system can be so unfair to us and that to win we are being asked to transform into something approaching an 'angel of death'. In cases involving women who are not openly deviant in the required manner, men have no chance of success and are probably better to try to arrange some accomodation with the children's mother, rather than fight a fight they will lose. Many would be well advised to try to 'stay in there' for the time being.

All of this of course needs to change. But how do we go about it?

Do you have meetings, members etc?

Today I spent an hour with a senior police officer trying to argue that the way the PSNI are enforcing the harassment legislation is allowing the harasser to have "two free goes" at their victim before there is a prosecution. Sadly the conversation ended with the officer stating that she felt that if I was correct, a change in the law was necessary. I have asked a councillor on Ards Council to raise the issue at a Policing Board meeting, but I am not sure if he will.